Leaving academia

If you’ve followed my blog closely, you might have noticed that I haven’t posted much over the last few months... Or maybe you haven’t noticed. That’s fine too! Regardless, there’s a reason that I’ve been taking a break from posting here. There have been some BIG changes in my life and my business, the biggest change being that I quit my job in April. That’s right, I’ve officially left academia.

Leaving academia wasn’t a decision that I made lightly. In a lot of ways, I think it’s something I’ve been coming to terms with over the last several years, ever since I was a graduate student and realized that the traditional tenure track path wasn’t quite the right fit for me.

So why now? To be totally transparent, leaving academia now was something that I needed to do to protect my mental health. I spent a lot of time considering what would be the best path forward, and ultimately concluded that even though my business hasn't yet grown to the point that it can match my full-time salary, it was time for me to leave.

It can be really hard to make these kinds of decisions when the timing doesn't feel quite right. In a perfect world, I would have continued to treat my business as a “side hustle" until I felt comfortable leaving the stability of a regular paycheck and benefits. If you've been in a similar situation, you might have thought things like “What if I do this and everything turns out terrible?” or “What if I crash and burn?” or "What will everyone think of me??" or “What if I fail?”

“What if I fail?”

Believe me, I've thought those thoughts. I'm a recovering people pleaser and high- achiever. The thought that anyone would be disappointed in me or think I'm making an irresponsible decision… in the past, it's been enough to prevent me from trying anything that feels scary.

But if we never try scary things, that holds us back from some really cool experiences. If I had never started my business, I'd probably still be feeling stuck in my old job. I wouldn't have gotten connected with some pretty cool people and new friends. I wouldn't have learned all of the things that I'm capable of doing on my own.

So, when the scary “what if” thoughts come up, I answer the question honestly for myself. “What if I fail?" Well, the surest way to fail is to not try, but if I'm not able to grow my business the way I want to, I can just go get another full-time job. I know that I have skills that are employable. Those don't disappear the second I'm not employed by someone else.

There are very few paths that are set in stone.

When we come to a crossroads, it can be scary to consider going down the path that's unfamiliar or lacks the security and stability that we're used to, but some really cool things can happen when we do. And, it can be helpful to remind ourselves that very few paths are set in stone. If we make a decision and later want to go back to the way things were before, there are many ways that that's possible.